Saturday, August 16, 2008

New mom, new life lessons...

Okay, so I knew it was a bad idea, but I thought "Hey, we can keep the whole thing under control!" Was I wrong or what? Yesterday was my husband's younger sister's birthday party, and we went over so that he could drive the jetskis for her and her friends, a houseful of pre-teens and young teenagers. It was going to be mainly family, so we figured what's the harm in bringing Karli along? We would limit people holding her, touching her, etc.
Well, the holding part went okay, I only allowed my two sisters-in-law, my father-in-law, my husband's uncle, and his former nanny to hold her. Outside of that I stuck to an adamant "No, she's still really young and I'm not comfortable with it. Maybe when she is older." Apart from one younger party guest who was very insistent (and very disappointed when I didn't give in), the rule was accepted and the young girls went off to do their own things and left the baby alone. As for the touching, I felt like I was working on becoming a body guard, perfecting my maneuvers to place myself between my little chipmunk and the over eager hands that constantly pursued the feel of her uber-soft skin.
I also dealt with a certain person's total dogging of my husband and my parenting skills right in front of me (hello! New mom, new dad, never been down this road before and learning as we go! I dont care if you have a million kids more than me and think your burping skills superior to all!).
The one thing that I really should have known better about, but completely spaced on was the fact that my husband comes from a very large and energetic family. Meaning loud, and sometimes prone to chaotic rough-housing- don't get me wrong, I love my in-laws, and my husband's family! Their energy is great and I enjoy being around them. But when the noise and action kept migrating towards my darling little girl I realized "Uh-oh..." The activity was overwhelming for Karli, and in turn her stress had me distressed. She didn't even want to eat like she normally does, spending about half as much time nursing as usual. I felt so bad because by the end of the party I was in a "Get the hell outta here" mood and very snappish, wanting to comfort and nurse my uspset girl in the quiet privacy of our own home, I was so focused on trying to calm her and getting out the door as quickly as possible that I barely said any good-byes to the family.
Ryan felt really bad and was so down on himself when we got home. He kept apologizing, stating he should have known, and he should have helped more, and he's sorry he has this flaw and that flaw. It really bugged me that he was being so hard on himself, yeah we knew things tend to get crazy over there, but we are still figuring out this whole mom and dad thing - we will still be figuring it out 18 years from now hunny! He is such a great guy and amazing with Karli, never giving himself enough credit, I wish I could give him a swift kick in the rear and he would instantly have more confidence in himself.
I will say something good came out of it all. Karli slept very well last night, and is nursing better today. We are staying in all day, relaxing, cuddling and not getting off our butts as much as possible. I love days like this sometimes.

1 comment:

Mama P said...

Congrats on the beautiful baby! I love hearing from you at BabyCenter and look forward to checking out your blog. Andrea from BabyCenter.